


Love Boat

by deedeeinfj



Category: Firefly
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-09
Updated: 2013-02-09
Packaged: 2017-11-28 18:24:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 466
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/677454
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deedeeinfj/pseuds/deedeeinfj
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jayne doesn't like the crew's priorities.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Love Boat

**Author's Note:**

> Written in 2005.

It's nothin but love and googly-eyes on this gorram ship.   
  
I joined up for this crew cause I conjured there might be some fun in it, ridin around the 'verse and shootin Reavers. Also cause there was good money in it at the time. Well, there's fun in it, no doubt about that. I got more explosives and guns stocked up than an Alliance cruiser. Get to use 'em, too, on Reavers, Alliance, and whatever else takes the notion to cross me.  
  
But you think I'm ridin on a boat with soldiers and convicts and tough guys? Hell no.  
  
I'm ridin on the Love Boat. Cap'n wants the whore. Pilot's married to the first mate. Mechanic's hot for the doctor - and maybe for the whore too, I can't rightly make out, but it's a thing I like to think on, if you follow me. Me? I'd take the whore, the first mate, or the mechanic. All at once if I had to. Point is, I don't much like every gorram person on this here boat kissin and wrastlin in their bunks when I got no friend but Vera. It's me and the crazy girl and the preacher all alone in this, and it ain't the picture I conjured when I signed up.  
  
If it was like this in the war, it's not hardly a surprise that Mal and his people lost. "Let's go shoot down that ship." "Hold a cotton pickin minute while I moon over this here woman." I never mooned over any woman. I'm a man who likes what he sees and takes her round back the bar. Not Mal. In love with a whore and ain't yet been man enough to give her some coin and throw down in the shuttle. Even had a wife a while back. Wouldn't do nothin with her neither, though she was all ready to go. Wouldn't do nothin with her, and wouldn't let me have her. Cause make no mistake, I asked.   
  
Same with the doctor, 'cept he don't even got to pay Kaylee. Kaylee'd let that man in her breeches any time, any place he set his mind to. Wash at least went for Zoe, which I gotta say is my only hint he's a man. Playin with toys and always tryin to calm everybody out of their shootin moods as he does.  
  
They moan and groan about no jobs and no coin and no this and no that. Ain't no wonder when they can't conjure up nothin to do but get addlepated and lovey-dovey. Everybody wants in somebody else's bunk, and ain't nobody goin.  
  
Well, there's me goin, but I all the time get kicked out.  
  
At least somebody on this boat wants some coin and some action and ain't afraid to go for either.


End file.
